There’s a question every woman that is single and waiting for the right man to enter her life must ask. It is whether wait mode has caused her to hit the pause button on other vital parts of her life. Sometimes we can do this and not realize it. We might begin to feel that we can’t have a certain level of fulfillment unless we have a spouse or a significant relationship. In Matthew 16:19(NLT), Jesus Christ said “And I will give you the keys of the Kingdom of Heaven. Whatever you forbid on earth will be forbidden in heaven, and whatever you permit on earth will be permitted in heaven.” This verse is exactly the wisdom we need to release the pause button. If we take heed to its wisdom, we’ll head down a path that pleases God and helps us unlock a truth within that every successfully married woman has opened.
For many single Christian women, the wait month after month, year after year, has gotten to be exhausting. A sister friend said to me just the other day that she’s been divorced for twenty years, and she never thought she would be single that long. She declared boldly, “It’s time!” I was moved by her declaration and pray that she will cross paths with her future spouse very soon. I’m sympathetic because I have experienced this same frustration, feeling that the wait has been too long. On top of this, it’s discouraging to see so many women that are experiencing the same frustration.
I’m a firm believer in asking critical questions. I was brought up to believe that a person should never question God, but I have come to know that this isn’t an approach that leads to enlightenment. We can’t open the door to greater truths if we don’t ask questions. So, we must come to God through the Lord Jesus Christ, and humbly ask Him the questions that are on our hearts. Then, we must believe that He will give us the answer. James 1:5(NLT) tells us, “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.” If we feel we’re waiting too long for a blessing to come to pass, we must ask God about it and be courageous enough to face the answer. Because this answer will most certainly lead us to a greater demonstration of faith in God through Christ.
Wisdom is necessary for any pursuit, and it is most certainly a must for marriage. God doesn’t keep His wisdom a secret. He is a God of order, and He tells us how to walk in His blessings continually. The wisdom that leads to walking in God’s blessings continually can be found in Matthew 6:33, where Jesus Christ tells us to seek the Kingdom of God and His righteousness first, and blessings will be added to us. This is a very simple thing, but some of us have made it quite complicated. This verse shows us what is most important to Heavenly Father, and it is that our hearts are anchored in our desire for Him more than any other thing. This speaks to intimacy in our relationship with God. He is showing us how this intimacy is supposed to look. When He sees our lives, there must be irrefutable evidence that seeking Him is our primary focus.
As women, the desire for marriage and wanting to cross paths with our future husbands feels very natural to many of us. Why is this? Could it be that the desire for marriage is engrained within? Could it be that somewhere inside of us there is a knowing that marriage is a part of our destiny? Could it be that we pursue our desire for marriage because we can’t imagine not pursuing it? Think about the answers to those questions and then pull the measuring stick out further. Ask yourself if you’ll move to a new city or town if you knew you’d meet your future spouse there? Would you give up a bad habit for his happiness? Would you spend less and give more for the betterment of your marriage? If you will do these things for a human being, you must be willing to do much more for God.
This strong desire for marriage comes from within, but I submit to you that the purpose to which God has called us is an even stronger desire than the one for marriage. And we will sometimes use our desire for marriage and other things as a way of avoiding the real work that God has called us to do. Our purpose within God’s plan is a treasure that He placed within us in Christ before we were born. We are not allowed to wait until we are married to begin to walk in it.
Successfully married women of God are convinced of their purpose in the Lord Jesus Christ. We don’t have to know all the details of our purpose, but there must be evidence in our lives that when we are called to carry forth something for the Kingdom, we won’t allow anything to keep us from doing what God has asked of us. Only this kind of commitment to God can sustain the foundation on which a lasting marriage will rest.
If it requires waiting a hundred years, we must be convinced that God will condition us and give us the strength to wait, and that at the end of our wait will be a tremendous reward. The Apostle Paul gives us a picture of what this looks like in Philippians 4:11-13(NLT). He said, “Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. 12 I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. 13 For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”
We can’t afford to put our purpose on pause for any person or any reason. God has no pleasure in watching His daughters yearn for a blessing year after year. He expects us to trust that the secret of living is knowing we can do everything He desires of us through Christ. The secret of living is being committed to follow the example Jesus Christ has given us. Be confident that even though you don’t see things coming together on the marriage front, they are. Let God see that you have placed your desire to please Him above all others. Be willing to spend however long it takes to prove this to Him. When our trust is firmly in God, He will do as He said in Isaiah 45:3 and give us treasures He’s stored up for us. He’ll do this so we will be convinced that He is the One True God, and He is a Father who never fails His children.■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
“It’s Time!” written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack, for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.