Galatians 5:19-21(NLT)
“19 When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, 21 envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.”
Is there any area of your life that you would consider to be out of balance? What about your relationships with your friends and family or even your attitude and behavior with people you don’t know? How about your personal habits – do your habits resemble laziness, gossiping, lying or even immorality? All of these can be a struggle for many of us. Everyone has habit patterns that are not aligned with the example of Christ. Small problems can turn into big ones when we bring these habit patterns into our relationships without allowing the Lord to help us deal with them.
Balance is the state of being where different elements are equal or in their correct proportions. In a personal sense, when there’s balance in our lives, it gives us a sense of peace because everything seems manageable; we feel like we’ve got a good handle on things. In 1Corinthians 14:33, God tells us that He’s not the author of confusion and chaos. He’s the author of peace, so we can be confident that when disorder is in the picture, the devil is attempting to stir up trouble. One of the ways the devil gets into relationships is by using the thing we haven’t dealt with. The way to restore the peace of God in this situation is not to blame the other person. We have to humble ourselves before God and ask Him to reveal the root of the problem so we can restore His peace.
Some people don’t like the sound of that because it means they can’t do what they want to do. It means we have to walk in a certain discipline so that peace is maintained. Many believers have rejected this discipline and allowed the world’s standard into their hearts. We should not be fooled because the devil is a liar. Much of the world’s standard is drenched in a cesspool of immorality. As God’s children, we can’t achieve life in the Spirit with a “I’ll do it if it feels good” attitude. This can’t be our motivation if we want to please God through the Lord Jesus Christ. God’s Word has to be our standard. And yes, sometimes we must hold ourselves to a higher standard in Christ than the significant person in our lives.
I shared this with someone who wanted my opinion about moving in with her significant other of nine months. She said, “We know we want to get married but we both agree that it’s best to live together first before we commit to marriage.” Years ago, during my grandmother’s time, she would hear about an unmarried couple living together, and she would say, “God don’t bless no mess!” Living together before marriage is very prevalent now, but this doesn’t mean that God approves, it means that less and less people are trusting His standard.
Many single Christian women struggle in this area because they’ve been single for a long time. Once they have a special someone in their lives, they want to do whatever’s necessary to keep this person happy and satisfied. The very best course of action is to pause and ask the Lord to intervene. Instead of proceeding and assuming the Lord will be okay with our choices, we need to allow Him to lead and guide us, because He knows what is best for us. He knows when we’re operating in such a way that we’re ignoring things in a relationship that are going to cause major problems down the road.
We should all want to be with a person that God has presented as the best person for us. This is the only way we can truly have confidence in a marriage, and considering the times we’re in, this confidence is crucial. You don’t have to test out a relationship when you have given God the lead. Your humility will allow God to help and teach you to handle your own stuff so that you are spiritually mature enough to weather any storm in a significant relationship.
People are of the mindset that God’s institution of marriage is a risk and living together isn’t. Exactly the opposite is true. Any time that we make a move that is outside what God has sanctioned, we are taking a risk that is not going to end well. 1Corintians 6:12 tells us that we have a right to do anything we want, and we exercise this right every moment of every day, but this right of free-will is only possible because God has blessed us with it. And because of this, we should have just as much faith that He will guide us to make the best decisions and choices for our relationships with others. God’s standard is best. It’s the highest standard and holding ourselves to it means that our relationships will flourish, and it will also mean that we’re honoring our relationship with God and making it our first priority.
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
“Holding Yourself to A Higher Standard” written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2020. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.