Acts 17:26(NLT) tells us, “From one man he created all the nations throughout the whole earth. He decided beforehand when they should rise and fall, and he determined their boundaries.” For the unmarried woman believer that desires to be married to her destiny partner, Acts17:26 must sink deep within her soul. Society tries to program females from a very early age that a woman can do anything a man can do, and maybe better. In many ways, this attitude is contrary to the plan and perfection of our Heavenly Father’s design. A woman cannot produce sperm and a man cannot carry a baby in his body, no matter how advanced science may be. The woman is no less than the man, but we cannot escape the reality that their roles are different, and any belief contrary to this will be counterproductive to God’s Will and Plan. It will be a departure from the faith of Jesus Christ that is necessary for a Godly marriage and family.
God created all the nations of the world through the creation of one man, Adam. This verse does not say that He created all the nations from one couple, and it does not say He created all the nations from one man and from one woman. God makes the anointing and role of a man very clear to us. He took a rib from the man’s body and made the woman. He has allowed us to know the truth of His masterful design, and it is the reality that the woman was made from the body of the man. This is the pattern God set for His family, because He has made us His children from one man, Jesus Christ. It’s one of the reasons that Jesus Christ had to leave the throne of God, take on human form, and come to the earth in order to save us. We had to be born again of God’s spiritual seed, and we had to do it through him, God’s only begotten Son, Jesus Christ.
If you miss this, you’ll miss a whole lot. The Lordship of Jesus Christ is unchallengeable. It is uncompromising. Once we accept him as Lord, it is not a situation where we are co-lords. This is a piece of knowledge that cannot slip by us. If we, as women of God, make the mistake of misunderstanding what it means to have a lord, and all that this requires and entails, we are in affect demonstrating a rebellious nature and one that fears being under authority. This will cause us to miss the blessing of marriage, but more importantly, we will not have allowed ourselves to be trained by the Holy Spirit to be prepared for greater blessings and responsibilities in the Kingdom.
God is Sovereign. He has no equal. We are in training for submission to God in Christ through being in submission to our husbands. That’s why you can’t afford to want to marry someone that God didn’t tell you to. As women, we came out of a man’s body to be joined to a man’s body. What God joins together, let no one separate (Mark 10:9). You’re not submitting to the husband because he is always right, you’re submitting to the husband to demonstrate your faith that God is always and forever right. God is the One that puts a couple together, and when we step outside the parameters of this truth, chaos and confusion will exist and often destroy a relationship.
Two people coming together is no joke. It’s takes loads of prayer, fasting, and faith. Sometimes, there will be decisions and choices that you’ll need to make as a couple and both people are on completely opposite sides of the spectrum. You have to find a way to come together, and the only way to do this is to be led by the Spirit through patience, self-control, and trusting God. He works it out. He causes all things to work together for the good of the couple. God doesn’t miss a beat and it is impossible for Him to fail. The woman of God must be anchored in this spiritual reality before she marries.
Establishing unity in a marriage is extremely uncomfortable at times, for both individuals. The patience to work it out is learned before the marital commitment, and in our modern times, often it is learned during dating. And in dating, our real struggle with ‘who’s the boss’ comes to the surface, but this is an argument no human being can win. We tell ourselves, “I’m doing what is best for me!” but if we truly knew what is best for us, we’d never be in a position where giving someone an ultimatum is necessary. The truth is that we are not the boss. We belong to God, and the steps of the righteous are ordered by Him. We must be ever so careful that our honor for God’s sovereignty, perfection, love, and His Will and plan for us, is uncompromising.
Giving an ultimatum is telling someone that your patience is running out. You’re letting the man know that you’ve dated long enough, and you are ready to take the next step to get married. Sometimes, the man will comply with this pressure, and sometimes he won’t, but either way, the end result can yield resentment on the part of the man. Is that a good way to begin a marriage and does it provide a strong building block to begin a solid marital foundation? We need to allow for the possibility that in the long run, it may do more harm than good.
When we consider the faith walk, we should try to be as strong and stable as possible. What does this mean for the single woman? It means that we can’t approach God’s institution of marriage with an attitude and mindset of arrogance or rebellion. We don’t know what is best for us, God does. He set up marriage as a way to bless families and spouses. God woos us with His overwhelming, unlimited, and unconditional love. He works through the man to do the same to the woman. If you don’t believe you deserve to be wooed, that’s another story, but if you do, you will have faith in God that He knows what He’s doing.
There are too many things to consider when it comes to being prepared for a marital commitment and choosing the right person to commit to. There is no possible way we can navigate it all on our own. Can an ultimatum be used to further God’s blessing, it is possible I’m sure, but not without His directive. We can never afford to get ahead of God in any situation, especially not marriage. You can’t say you heard from God without receiving His confirmation first. If you have received confirmation that you are indeed dating the person that He has signaled and stamped as your destiny partner, then your faith must be firmly planted in that. You don’t get to rush it because, quite frankly, you are not in charge, God is. So, we must be clear that however or whatever our approach, we are required to be confident, patient, and willing to allow God to work out the details as we place all our faith in Him.■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
“Do Ultimatums Work?” written by Reverend Fran Mack, edited by Kim Times, for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2021. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!