Everyone in my family knows I love to bake. From chocolate chip cookies and peach cobbler to my mom’s favorite sock-it-to-me cake, I’m always baking something sweet for everyone around me. There’s always some kind of sweet deliciousness in the kitchen whenever family or friends stop by, and they always look forward to being surprised by whatever recipe I’ve tried. My mom taught me that as a baker, there are some ingredients you must always have on hand; flour, sugar, butter, eggs, milk, and vanilla to name a few. You can make just about anything sweet with those key ingredients, and that’s a pretty good lesson to apply to relationships. With a few special ingredients, you can make a relationship sweet and filled with yummies like loyalty, respect, trust, unity, and love.
In the past, the saying that “the best way to a man’s heart is through his stomach” was something many women took literally. Years ago, it was a given that if you wanted to be a wife someday, you needed to learn to cook. That’s almost outdated these days, but the premise of preparing to be a blessing is forever relevant. When it comes to relationships, there’s no question that we need to learn how to bake love into everything we do. Jesus Christ teaches us exactly how to do this.
Discretion
Blessings can very easily slip out of our hands, and the enemy waits for the opportunity to steal them. When it comes to relationships, most of us have no clue where our vulnerabilities lay, and this more than anything else causes us to lose a relationship before it has the chance to grow. We think we can handle things on our own, and that simply isn’t the case. Our vulnerabilities get the best of us. We begin to react to situations with emotionalism and impulse, when we should respond with patience and the love of Christ. If we’ll allow Him, God will help us in our relationships, and one of the very important ways to partner with Him is to use discretion.
Psalm 11:22(ESV) says, “Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman without discretion.” Discretion is to behave in such a way that we avoid revealing something that should be kept private. We must not be the kind of woman that Psalm 11:22 speaks about. You must have a track record of discretion before you meet your future spouse. It’s an ingredient essential to a relationship’s success, particularly when it’s in its infancy. When a relationship is new, you must protect it from the tricks and plots of satan. Don’t let the devil weaponize information and cause people to sabotage what you have. This means you shouldn’t broadcast information and details about your boyfriend and the relationship you share. Give it the grace and discretion it needs to bake.
Understanding
Proverbs 18:2 (NLT) tells us, “Fools have no interest in understanding; they only want to air their own opinions.” All of us want to be heard and not overlooked or dismissed, but this need must be clothed in compassion and self-control. God understands us thoroughly and completely, and this is the most important thing. Dating comes with its own set of challenges. As spiritually mature Christians, God has equipped us to overcome those hurdles with understanding and compassion. This means that sometimes we need to keep our opinions to ourselves. We should never be judgmental and show a level of respect that is in line with the example of Christ.
Respect
Jesus Christ teaches in Matthew 7:12 (ESV), “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them.” Many of us have made this something we pull out only on certain occasions. That’s not the approach Jesus Christ taught. Matthew 7:12 should be our nature 24/7, even in the face of heated situations. We must recognize as single people that there are some things we simply cannot do in our significant relationships. If preserving the relationship is our goal, there are some behaviors that we must never display, and there are some words that we can never ever speak. Respect for one another demands this.
More than anyone else, the most significant person in our lives deserves to be a continual witness of the Christ in us. No other adornment will look as beautiful on our womanhood as God’s love. Wear it well. Pray that God will help you get spiritually prepared to bake your relationship with His grace and love. Learn the patience and self-control to exhibit the discretion, understanding, and respect Jesus Christ requires. This is how we ready ourselves for some serious baking, and the outcome will always be delightful and sweet. ■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.
“A Relationship’s Key Ingredients”, written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.