Proverbs 5:21 (NIV)
“For your ways are in full view of the Lord, and he examines all your paths.”
If we pull back all the layers of our emotional turmoil and doubt, we often find that at the root is a deep longing for more out of life. We want to expand and express ourselves in a fuller way, and this is really at the heart of our desire for marriage. For many single sisters in Christ, this is the goal. And it’s not only about companionship; it’s about stepping into a fuller version of ourselves. Trust me, God sees the longing and knows our hearts intimately.
Taking a closer look under the hood, we might also find that we’re holding on to this desire as if we’re the ones to make it a reality. Here’s what we have to know: our longing for marriage must be surrendered to God. It can’t be smothered in doubt, or driven by fear, impatience, or comparison. When we hand it over to the Father, we’ve got to trust His timing and His heart for us. That’s when we open the door for true peace. Psalm 37:4 (NLT) reminds us, “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires.” This isn’t about chasing after what we want and asking God to bless it. It’s about letting Him shape our desires to align with His Will and plan for our lives.
This is where examination time comes in. Proverbs 5:21 reminds us that God is not just watching our steps; He’s weighing our hearts. Before we get frustrated with the waiting, we have to pause and ask ourselves some real questions. Am I truly walking by faith, or have I let discouragement and self-will creep into my journey? Is my desire for marriage rooted in God’s glory or just my own timeline?
Letting our desire for marriage to be rooted in God’s glory means that we understand with crystal clarity that marriage is God’s institution. It means we are seeing marriage the way that He sees it — not just as a fix for loneliness, but as a covenant that reflects His love, His faithfulness, and His character. It means wanting a marriage that will honor Him first, not just to try to make us feel complete—and that’s a big one because only God can complete us, and He has done this through Jesus Christ. Colossians 2:10 (NLT) reminds us, “So you also are complete through your union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler and authority.”
When we grasp that, it changes everything about how we pray. It shifts the prayer from “God, give me what I want” to “God, prepare me to be who You’ve called me to be, whether in marriage or in singleness.” When our hearts line up with His purpose, we can genuinely say, “Not my will, but Yours be done.” That kind of surrender doesn’t shrink our dreams — it sanctifies them. It lifts them higher than anything we could’ve built on our own.
When we get the truth of our completeness in Christ settled deep in our hearts, we stop idolizing marriage, and we start pursuing wholeness in God. Marriage becomes a blessing, not a lifeline. It becomes an extension of the life we already have in Christ, not a desperate attempt to find meaning or identity.
Examination time should be like a regular spiritual check-up— a serious moment to pause and honestly evaluate whether we’ve truly surrendered our will to His. 2 Corinthians 13:5 (NLT) puts this challenge to all of us, whatever our desires may be: “Examine yourselves to see if your faith is genuine. Test yourselves. Surely you know that Jesus Christ is among you; if not, you have failed the test of genuine faith.” It’s not about shaming ourselves — it’s about welcoming the Holy Spirit to reveal any places where our trust has slipped. It’s about making sure we’re still anchored in Christ, even while we wait for His promises to unfold.
The beautiful thing is, God is full of mercy. He doesn’t expose us to condemn us — He reveals to heal us. Psalm 139:23-24 (NLT) says, “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” If we’re willing to sit still and let God examine us, He will lead us forward with a renewed heart—not just ready for marriage, but ready for more of Him. ■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
“Examination Time”, written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack and KLizzie for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.