Too Much Too Soon?

A friend went all out for her new boyfriend’s birthday and put a lot of thought in all the details. She planned a day that was all about pampering him. It included the works at a very nice spa and a fancy dinner together later that evening. He was blown away and remarked that he couldn’t believe she had done all that for him.

The thing that made all this so special is that it was a big investment for my friend, financially and emotionally. Having lost her job last year, and now just beginning to get back on her feet, she made sacrifices to make this day special for him. She wanted him to know how much he means to her.

He appreciated her efforts and loved his birthday, but was it too much too soon?

It isn’t always easy to gauge these things. As believers, we’re commanded and taught by our blessed Lord and Savior to give to others out of the abundance of our hearts. The Apostle Paul said in Acts 20:35(NLT), “And I have been a constant example of how you can help those in need by working hard. You should remember the words of the Lord Jesus: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” Jesus Christ also told us in Luke 6:38(NLT), “Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.” So, we are never the worse for giving from our hearts because our giving will always be returned to us.

God has set things up in such a way that giving is how we remain in a beautiful cycle of giving and receiving, it’s one of the ways we keep ourselves flowing in God’s abundance. The important detail we must not overlook is that we don’t get to determine how our giving is returned to us, and we don’t get to control who God will work through to bless us. We might expect that if we invest and pour ourselves into someone that we care about, he will in turn do the same for us, but this isn’t always the case.

One of the most significant decisions that two people in a relationship will make is deciding if they should get married. It’s wonderful if they get along well, enjoy each other’s company and appear to be compatible, but when it comes to a relationship that we hope will endure and last a lifetime, we can’t be quick to jump to conclusions. We need that all important green light from Heavenly Father.  

My friend was recently disappointed that her boyfriend didn’t reciprocate the same level of thoughtfulness on her birthday that she had put into his. He made promises but didn’t keep them. We can minimize stress like this on a relationship by using God’s wisdom and allowing Him to steer our actions. When we’re motivated to give and invest in a man solely because we think it will make him love us more, it doesn’t always work out. The best way is to follow God’s directions so that we are wise about our expectations and choices.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Too Much Too Soon?”, written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack, for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2021. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.

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