Recently, I heard a man say, “Men aren’t scared of marriage; they’re scared of divorce.” That statement stuck with me because there’s truth to it. Many men aren’t hesitant about committing—they’re hesitant about what happens if that commitment falls apart. Statistics show that the majority of divorces are initiated by women. It can’t be lost on us that both partners make that vow to stand together “for better or for worse,” and the truth of it is that some men are often the ones who hold on to that promise longer. They may not always voice their fears, but many carry a quiet apprehension about giving their all to a relationship, only to one day find themselves alone, starting over from scratch.
Ephesians 1:3, 11 (NLT) says: “3 All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ. 11 Furthermore, because we are united with Christ, we have received an inheritance from God, for he chose us in advance, and he makes everything work out according to his plan.” Our Heavenly Father has seen to it that all of us have a purpose in His perfect plan. Nothing about our lives is random, and none of us can afford to ignore this truth, especially when it comes to marriage. We were created for God’s purpose, and this is as much a part of a man’s makeup as it is a woman’s.
Purpose is the lens that helps us prioritize God’s agenda for every marital union. When our perspective shifts in this way, we often realize that for many men, marriage isn’t just about love—it’s also about purpose, stability, and legacy. Philippians 2:13 (NLT) tells us: “For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.” The drive to fulfill their purpose, obtain stability, and to establish a legacy are ingrained; God has woven these aspirations into manhood, and good men will consider them to be very important. Therefore, they won’t enter marriage lightly, and when they do, they often intend to stay, even when things get difficult. But the fear of losing everything in a divorce—family, home, financial security, and even their sense of identity—can weigh heavily on them. They may not voice these fears but silently, they might be wondering: What if I give my all, only to be left with nothing? It’s not just about heartbreak; it’s about the fallout that follows, and for some of them, the risk may feel too high.
The Bible tells us in Proverbs 4:23 (NLT) “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” Men are trying to guard their hearts, and women are too, but it’s the way that we guard our hearts that makes all the difference. We shouldn’t go to the extreme because this can lead to treating people as disposable, only valuing them for what they can give us. We can’t use people for our own personal gain then discard them. That’s not Godly. We place ourselves in the position of having to pay for this because we’ve caused harm to them and their relationship with God. Philippians 2:3-4 (NLT) both warns and encourages us: “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.” When we’re truly guarding our hearts, we treat others with respect, valuing them as our Heavenly Father does.
The thing we’re missing is the reassurance, and guidance that comes from God. It’s true: the quest to find someone compatible—bringing as much to the table spiritually, mentally, and emotionally as we do—is no joke. In the middle of all our striving and searching, it’s easy to forget that God alone is the One that holds the plan for our lives. He wants all of us to have a happy ending; He wants it as much for men as He does for women.
God’s plans for us are good, and He longs for us to walk in the fullness of His love and purpose. He is as invested in our well-being, joy, and success as we are, but to get to that place of peace and fulfillment, we have to trust Him. We’ve got to trust His guidance, embrace His wisdom, and surrender our hearts to Him. This opens the door to experience the happy ending we desire so much. It’s real and available to us, and when we are committed to God’s perfect Will and timing, we’ll receive it. ■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
“Men Deserve A Happy Ending Too”, written by KLizzie, edited by Reverend Fran Mack, for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.